Showing posts with label Relats conjunts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Relats conjunts. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 17, 2024

Relats conjunts: Sobre la ciutat

«Sobre la ciutat» (Marc Chagall – 1918)
*
Relats conjunts
 
 

Somehow I could not sleep in Walpurgis Night. So I got up again, put on my clothes, took the car and drove into the night. After some miles I decided to try what I had not done since I was a little boy. In X - my birthplace - I left the car, looked around to make sure nobody watched me, and then ran as fast as I could and ... yes ... took off. And nobody running behind me, trying to reach my legs and pulling me down. How lovely flying over the roofs, sobre la ciutat.
So why not making a little trip?

One hour later I could see fire shining on the Brocken. As I have no official flying-license, and to avoid the traffic jam over the top, I landed smoothly at the foot of the Brocken, and started to climb. It was raining now, but I didn´t mind. After one hour I arrived at a small clearing. Crossing it suddenly a fairy appeared in front of me, aside her a Leprechaun.

"What are you doing here, Sean?" the fairy asked.

"Climbing up to the top of the Brocken."

"Could be the shortest way to hell", snorted the Leprechaun. "Any milk in your pockets?"

Oh dear! Of course I had no milk in my pockets. That could become difficult. Leprechauns can get extremely naughty, if one has no milk for them, and if it´s deep in the night inmidst a clearing half way to the top of the Brocken.

Automatically I searched my pockets, and ... felt ... impossible!! ... something cool ... a bottle of milk.

Whilst reaching it to the Leprechaun my eyes thought to catch a smile from the fairy's lips.

"Thank you, mate", the Leprechaun said without any surprise in his voice, and immediately started to drink.

"Thank you", I thought in direction of the fairy.

"You are welcome", she said. "Have a wish?"

"Eh, you mean ...?"

"Indeed."

"Any rules?"

"He sounds like a damn clever Paddy", the Leprechaun giggled.

"Indeed", said the fairy. "Even fairies couldn´t fulfil the wish of making a peaceful paradise of this planet. Therefore your wish must be a very personal one."

"Hm. ... Allright then: I wish ..."

"Stop!" said the Leprechaun.

"Yes?"

"You must not speak out your wish, otherwise the magic is gone. Just think it."

"Thank you, friend. But why are you so kind?"

The Leprechaun took his pipe between his lips, blew some smoke-rings and said: "Lucky you had milk in your pockets, mate."

So I thought my wish, and just wanted to say bye, when the Leprechaun asked: "Not surprised we know your name?"

"Well, yes. But I have heard the little folk knows quite a lot."

"We have no cameras, though."

"Cameras?"

"Do you remember the rainbow you shot some years ago on Beara Peninsula?"

"Yes, I like this photo very much."

"So do we", laughed the Leprechaun. "You see, your photo helped us find the gold-pot at the end of the rainbow."

"But ... but ... but how and when did you see the photo? The film got developed in Germany."

"Hm, as you said: We do know quite a lot."

"Keep your secret, friends", I said. We shook hands, and I continued to climb upwards.

Somehow everything was easier. Only the din I thought to have heard from the top had calmed down. Nothing to hear. At last I reached the top. Incredible. Wherever I looked sleeping witches. Two or three seemed to have had an accident: Still sitting on their brooms they looked like being sticked against the trees. Slowly moving on I realised there was only one witch still being dancing. Never heard mystic music reached my ear. I moved on. The witch seemed not to have noticed me. She danced. Beautifully. Ten meters and I'd be able to see her face in the shine of the fire. Trying to make no noise I tiptoed.

Suddenly there was a big noise, as if a giant blew his breath. From one second to the other the fire went out. When my eyes got used to the darkness, I realized a last glowing, in front of where I had seen the witch dancing. At least the full moon sent his silvery shine to the clearing. I hesitated. Carefully I walked on, stumbled over a dead branch. At least I thought so. In the next moment my bottom got a hit, and it was as if a voice hissed: „Idiot." I turned round, bent forward and - it was a broom.

„Was it you who called me idiot?" I whispered.

„At least your ears are intact."

„Why at least?"

„Well, if your eyes were better, you wouldn´t have stumbled over me and disturbed my Peace of the Night."

„Excuse me, but that´s ..."

„Schscht. Not so loud. You could get in damn trouble, if you woke up the ladies. - So now, calm down, sir.: What did you want to ask?"

„Better not to ask anything. I thought it only surprising that you chose ... almost I had said : my phrase."

„Never mind. If you want to stay stupid, don´t ask."

„Well ... then ... How did you come to use it?"

„My boss once - about five years ago - began to wish me the Peace of the Night."

„Your boss?!"

„Well, correctly spoken: my Queen."

„Your Queen? What´s her name?"

„Can´t tell you. Not fancy to get a bloody nose."

„Please."

„No, but you can ask herself."

... and the broom turned around and lay as if sound asleep.

Asking herself? Oh dear! Heart bumping. Blood rushing. Slowly I turned round. There she was. Behind the glooming fire she had stopped dancing. Now she slowly moved in my direction. Passing the gloom I got a glimpse of her face. Unlike the other witches I had seen before, she had no long hair. I got excited. She came closer. Should I flee? No, I decided to stay. Decided? Anyway, soon I'd see her face. 13 meters, twelve, eleven, ten, nine ... three steps more and she would appear in the moon´s cone. ... One ... black brown hair ... two ... my heart jumped ... three ... I saw nothing. I turned round. Where there had been the moon now was a big dark cloud. My knees felt like pudding. My nose smelled a parfume it had never smelled before. What would happen in the next moment? Ah, at least I'd have asked. But only I had opened my mouth I heard her voice very very close to my ear: She said: ...

Z...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz .................

In the next moment I woke up. In front of our house the musicians of the local fire-brigade had intonated „The May has arrived." Later on I saw the car where it is usually parked. But for hours I had nine words echoeing in my head: „I told you, it´s not fate, Sean ... it´s magic!"

That´s my story. And I wonder what will happen next.

Saturday, November 16, 2024

Relats conjunts: Interior de taller

«Interior de taller» (Ramon Casas – 1883)
Relats conjunts

"The party is over", [...]

 

[...] spake The Poor Poet.

Saturday, October 19, 2024

Impressió, sol ixent

«Impressió, sol ixent»
(Claude Monet – 1872)

My impression at first glance: I would love to have this Monet hanging in my library.
My monetary condition doesn't allow for it, though.

Saturday, September 21, 2024

The Morning after the Deluge

Light and Colour (Goethe's Theory)
The Morning after the Deluge
Moses Writing the Book of Genesis

- William Turner -

a Relats conjunts



Moses? Writing the Book of Genesis? The Morning after the deluge?
Ha!
Turner 181 years ago but anticipated a humble villager sitting in a world full of war & terror, severely emptied of love and empathy; a world of hatred, extreme stupidity, selfishness and I! I! I!
Knowing that he would not be able to change everything this humble villager would not write the Book of any Genesis but just write down a tiny dream:
All machos of planet Earth, including all Taliban and the King of Saudi Arabia, his complete entourage including judges and clergy being sent from the desert into devils' kitchen where they are getting preferential treatment: Heaviest swearboarding which would not end before these ... hm ... these "gentlemen" would promise with immediate effect to veil their faces up til infinity and silently walk four steps behind their wives whilst lugging the shopping bags.

Wednesday, September 04, 2024

Relats conjunts – Goethe, Shakespeare, Barbolaire

A photograph by Miquel Àngel Vich alias Barbolaire

– Smoke hidden ghoulish faces, eyes, grimaces, torso of a female figure. Positive became negative. Smoke without sound.

– Words are mere sound and smoke, dimming the heavenly light.

– Says who?

– Goethe, Faust I.

– Lousy translation. Faust says, verse 3457: Name ist Schall und Rauch. Name is sound and smoke. Not words. May I ask who created this photographic artwork?

Didn't you just say names are sound and smoke?

Thanks a lot. But that was Goethe.

Nitpicker. Let's turn the whole thing on its head for fun. What do you see now?


– The female figure now on the left side of the picture. ... Actually, the whole picture looks even more feminine. And the little astronaut in his bubble capsule looks much more determined and optimistic.

– See? There are more things in heaven and earth, Sean, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

– Hamlet, Act 1, Scene 5.

– Yes, yes. Smart arse. But now: What is the name of the poetic photo artist?

– The name is at the top under the photo.
;-)

Wednesday, July 17, 2024

Relats d'estiu de la Carme. Juliol: Waiting in the Rain

Una fotografia de sa lluna

Oh, oh, oh, the way she's standing there! I can already sense it. She will turn round, the corners of her mouth dropped as a sign of extreme annoyance, and after a meaningful pause she will hiss: ‘How nice you're already here. My darling, you obviously don't know that other mothers have handsome sons too.’
Oh, may she stand there with indignation until another mum's handsome son falls for her.
Some mums have pretty daughters too.

And thus, if she hasn't died, she's still waiting.

Wednesday, June 19, 2024

Relats conjunts: The School of Athens

 

«L’escola d’Atenes» (Raffaello Sanzio – 1511)
The School of Athens
*
Relats conjunts
 

The luminaries of antiquity all together, from A for Aristotle to Z for Zarathustra. And what did they achieve?
In 2024, today's "luminaries" are able to destroy each other with the most modern weapons.
And this is then proudly called progress.

Tuesday, May 21, 2024

Relats conjunts: Still life with onions and herring

«Natura morta amb cebes i arengada»
(Isidre Nonell – 1910)

Hm ... onions ... fish ... onion fish: In German a Zwiebelfisch is a character that by mistake is printed in a font different from the rest.
So what did Isidre wish to tell us with this very painting that is (very probably) nothing but a d'arengada vermella (red herring)?
It's obvious: But I won't tell you.
Surely you will find out for yourselves, won't you? ;-)

Wednesday, April 17, 2024

The Reverse of a Framed Painting

Trompe-l'œil:
El revers d'una pintura emmarcada

(Cornelis_Norbertus_Gijsbrechts - 1668/72)
RELATS CONJUNTS
 

For quite some time, at least 36 minutes, the group had discussed what a viewer might expect if Gijsbrecht's frame were reversed.

"Anyway, I think a picture dies after a few years like the man who painted it."

"Hear, hear, Duchamp!" Manzoni smiled. "Gijsbrecht by now is up here for about 350 years, but his "Bagsiden af et indrammet maleri" can still be admired at the National Gallery of Denmark. 

"Papperlapapp", intoned Schönberg, "If it is art it is not for all and if it is for all it is no art."

Braque laughed. "Arnold, you know very well that art is meant to disturb."

"Quite, Georges", Picasso nodded, "moreover, art is the lie that enables us to realise the truth."

"Excuse me, Pablo, but that's shit!" stated Conte Meroni Manzoni di Chiosca e Poggiol.

"Didn't you say the same to your son regarding his artwork?" asked Petrus.

"Yes, but only to inspire him." 

"That's right." Piero Manzoni smiled. "My father inspired me to fill 90 tin cans with 30 grams of my faeces originally to be valued according to their equivalent weight in gold, thus $37 each in 1961. In August 2016, at an art auction in Milan, one tin sold for €275,000."

"Oh god", sighed Pascal, "imagination – it is that deceitful part in man, that mistress of error and falsity."

 "Chauvi!" hissed Nin. "Why mistress and not man of error and falsity?"

 "You won't change him after 350 years, Anaïs." Nietzsche stroked his beloved grey horse. "Blaise will never be able to give birth to a dancing star. He has no chaos in his heart."

Saturday, March 16, 2024

El joc de pòquer


Cassius Marcellus Coolidge
, 1894, Poker Game
RELATS CONJUNTS

Imagine folks: In 121 years, someone with too much money offers 658,000 dollars for a picture of our little poker round.
B: You don't say.
C: So there won't anyone be hungry in 2015?
A: Yes, but the person in question won't be interested in that.
D: 658,000 dollars for a picture of dogs playing poker?! I don't believe it!
A: That's as sure as Rostkam Gerstley & Co. will close up shop in 24 years.  
D: I bet a bottle of Old Saratoga Whisky against it.
A: Anyone else betting against it?
C: Me. Two bottles.
B: Me. Three bottles.
A: I want to see!

121 years later ...

Saturday, February 24, 2024

Relats conjunts de febrer: Madonna del Magníficat

Sandro Botticelli, 1481, Madonna del Magnificat


I make it short. ;-)

"For the sake of the book. Get the godlike out of my sight!"