Thursday, March 11, 2021

Claude


Re-reading lots of our correspondence, for the past three days I have been crying, smiling, laughing, tears bedewing my cheeks. Even now words don't come easy to me.

Claude is dead.

Almost I am not surprised that our last conversation on this blog was about what we shall be leaving when we die.

"Appeared" at Omnium in June 2008 as "Curieuse au Canada", over the years a friendship developed

Not that we would not have had this and that verbal skirmish, but very soon we agreed to that we disagreed to this and that, and focused on what we like best: (Good) literature, poetry, music and ...

... the fun we had f.e. on the occasional "poetry slams" here or at "The Poor Mouth"!

When once she told me her age I thought she was kidding.
And when she told me about her life: What a woman! What courage!

- - -

After I had told her a bit about Irish literature she wrote:

"Now I would like German Literature. I know so little. Unless I have read translations without noticing the country. I doubt it. 
 
Then maybe you could tell me some English, French, American favourites? Just would like to see if we meet somewhere among books. 
 
Of course, I read the Russians ( Who doesn't?) Also Faust, Peer Gynt, Don Quichotte, The Prophet, The Rubayyat.  Studied Greek and Latin and did some translations.
 
Inevitably I read a lot Canadians (French and English), not necessarily all good. But I feel it's a bit of a duty to know what one's country produces. 
 
We have about a ten-year-program in front of us. Just want to make sure you will not drop me in 3-4 weeks :)))))

I love you, Sir Jeating.


- - -

When I had told her that I am German and Sean Jeating's just my heteronym, she wanted to know more about German literature, and let me know:
Of course I have read some Germans. I couldn't name them instantly, not because I forgot them. It's only that when a book speaks to one's heart, it has no nationality.
Since my student years, I have met few people who read "without borders". I knew, when I discovered your blog, that you were universal.
I read all Hermann Hesse, more than once. Then Remarque, Zweig. Some Brecht, Kant and Schopenhauer. ...


- - -

Dreams.

When very young, I claimed to be a writer and a musician. I became a nurse and loved it. It gave me much to write about. I also never let go of music. But lifepain took over, killed much of my ambitions. I write...I need it like air and water. Sometimes I share it. Mostly it's in boxes. Now and again I read a page, or two...I say to myself, "Claude, it's very good!". Then I put it aside.

Music.
The Music Claude never put aside. Bach, Beethoven, Mozart, Abado, Bernstein, Argerich, Gulda ... Hvorostovsky ... Casals, Paco de Lucía; Fado or Flamenco, etc., etc., etc. ...
To please Claude's ears and her heart I tried to find Saturday Night Music. And by trying I learned a bit about music.

Poetry.
We shared some poetry, encouraged eachother. She was good.

I think Claude does like me finally to share this with you: 

There lie my dreams and deep pain.
The detritus of my past
In its destitute beauty.
No recall. No tears.
Adieu!

cpg

I love you, Claude. De tout cœur!
Sean

8 comments:

  1. She was exceptional. A fine addition to my days. Regarding the occasional "skirmish", which I had too, she would have believed that she would now be not "dead" but elsewhere, and would perhaps even be aware of our tributes. It would be nice, perhaps, but I doubt it, and I do strongly suspect that she has gone without realising that she has gone, which is the best way, surely? I will not forget her. Dear Claude.

    ReplyDelete
  2. She will be missed (perhaps more than she ever realised - which is a sadness).
    Even from the outside of her interaction with bloggers her quality was so very, very evident.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am sure Claude knew or rather felt our feelings and how much we enjoyed her company.

      Delete
  3. That is a fitting epitaph for a wonderful character. I wish I could have got to know her better. Thank you Sean.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Perhaps, dear Mark, now and then I shall tell a bit more about her. Thank you for your kind words.

      Delete
  4. I've just read her last conversation with you, that is so affecting! It would be lovely if her Grandson made contact with you (and Andrew)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, that would be wonderful. I'd so much like to be witness when Ethan opens the box.

      Delete