Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Spreading Mr. Kemal's news

This morning, during breakfast intensively reasoning the international situation Tetrapilotomos said:

Capita Turciensis, did you read this and this at Internation Musing?

By commenting I even risked a step backwards on my quest trying to become the politest blogger.

That's why I do ask. It was the first comment for quite a while, and by checking the labels Turkey and Turkishness on your blog I found your latest entry on Turkish affairs dates from Valentine's Day. Lost your love for Turkey, Sean?


Okay, interest.

No. And yes. I am a bit tired of reading always the same news, let alone writing about. Call it my Thoreau syndrom.

Well, anyway, I suppose I've news which will be of interest for you, your readers, for Turkey and the unimportant rest of the world.

I am all ears. [Yawn]

Later, Sean, later. I don't wish to keep you from mowing the lawn.


[Hours later, Tetrapilotomos and I sitting on balcony]


Yes, Sean?

You said you have an interesting news, for a change.

Ah yes. Almost forgot about. ... Well, it's just an exclusive interview with Mustafa Kemal.

The very Mustafa Kemal?


You're kidding.

My trustworthy source swears to high heaven her source's source is above any doubt and suspicion, and that the interview has, of course, been presented for authorization, and got Mr. Kemal's imprimatur. Want to read?

Please do it for me. My eyes are a bit tired this afternoon.

Alright then. [T. unfolding a sheet of paper]

Thanks for the audience, Effen - ... err ... Sir.

You are welcome.
Tea or Raki?


Fortunately liver cirrhosis is unknown in this sphere.

A Raki with the tea then, please. You are still follo...

Let's waste no time. Yes, I am best informed according almost everything which is happening in Turkey.

Thus, end of the preliminaries. What's your appraisement?

There is something rotten in the state of Turkey.

You mean ...

Well, not something. Almost everything.

Are you refering to the recent governing party, or ...

I am refering to all: education, historians, political parties, judiciary, media, government, opposition, clergy, milit...

Sorry, Sir. Opposition? You criticise the defenders of Kemalism?

Kemalism? [laughing] They may call it Kemalism, and pretend being the defenders of my principles, but what they are doing has nothing to do with my person and with my ideas.


They do obviously not even know what's the meaning of what they call Kemalism. Since November 1938 they have just been utilizing my name in order to make profit; to fill their pockets and to safeguard their power based privileges. Ah, let's speak about football.

Oh yes! Would you, however, allow me to ask two further questions?


Looking back, would you say that all your deeds were in accordance with your principles?

[Smiling] Hm. After the match we all are wiser, would you agree?

I'm all ears.

Some other time. My friend Adnan is waiting for our weekly game of chess. What's about meeting again Thursday afternoon?

Tomorrow's not possible?

No, in the morning I'll have a hack with Turgut, afterwards it's time for archery, and ...

Sorry, archery?

Yes, six arrows daily. Well, and in the afternoon some of my Armenian friends and I shall prepare ourselves for watching the semi final. [Refilling the glasses]

Your Armenian friends?

Yes. We'll together watch the game. Your tip?

I can even already tell you the result of the final, but, of course, I do not wish to spoil the tension ...

Out with it.

Russia 2 - Turkey 5.

Now, you are a very polite interviewer. Thursday we may even talk about what's a great tragedy. Your second question?

Lots of your countrymen and -women are being prosecuted for allegedly insulting you and your principles. What do you th...

Pah. Am I
Kemal Kerinçsiz? Nobody would ever be able to insult me.

Some people argue Turks do love feeling perpetual insulted more than football.

[Laughing] And next year someone will find out it's the seventh arrow of the Kemalistic
principles. As for your question: Yes, I am sure.


First and foremost, because I am as dead as a dodo.

Good argument.

Isn't it? And please,
spread the news amongst those who wouldn't yet know.

Promised, Sir. Apropos dodo, there do exist two definitions. By 'I am as dead as a dodo' you were refering to the first, I suppose?

Evet. As for the second definition, we may speak about in case we happen to appreciate f.e. character and intellect of Deniz Baykal.

Hm, Mr. Baykal might not only be not amused but feel badly insulted.

His problem. He can sue me. [smiling, raising his glass] Serefe.


  1. If only I could obtain such interviews. Did this involve DMP, and breathing apparatus a la The Dalkey Archive and the Narrator's and De Selby's meeting with St Augustine?

    As for the insults, Turkey could do well to ending its ridiculous sensitivity re its past and its idiotic prosecutions.

  2. Jams,
    won't tell more at that time, but I am entertaining the sneaking suspicion that I do know the source of Tetrapilotomos' source. Or is the suspicion entertaining me? :)
    We shall see.

    As for the pleasure of feeling insulted that many Turks nurture: I do absolutely agree with you and Mr. Kemal.

  3. You are right Sean, the ideals of Kemalism are always used in Turkey to conjure feelings of romanticism, victory, modernization, patriotism and nationalism amongst the society.

    How better to make the opposing party look bad, than to blame them of being against the Principles? Of Kemalism.

    Just like our friend George Bush, always wanting to do the best for other countries in his quest to spread ‘democracy and freedom’. America is the beacon of democracy.

    Likewise in Turkey, Deniz Baykal wants to be seen as the beacon of Kemalism. But those six arrows are becoming extremely blunt as they are pointed in archaic directions, in their effect to stir the will of the country.

    And as the populations are humbled by their leader’s initiatives and their adherence to moral values and steadfast philosophy; the leaders continue to play the game … enjoying the reward of lining their pockets and basking within their privileges. When in fact the leaders of either party do not give a ….

  4. Sean, do you and Lord Somber take courses in the obscure together? If so, keep at it and great to see you back blogging. Hope the Turkish love affair has the stamp of Attaturk and a nice Turkish coffee to go with it.

  5. Yesterday while shopping I bumped into a dear friend, Mustafa Aykol, who is branded as a Islamist...
    He was packing his car full with beer. I told him 'Mustafa, dont drink too much'. He replied: 'I will have some friends over and my girlfriend', so we are going to enjoy our time...
    Islamist, beer, girl friend, big car...something is wrong...)
    I asked him when his next article will be placed. 'Sorry Hans, I was out of the country' 'but tomorrow a piece will be placed in Turkish Daily called: Ataturks silhouete on the holy mountain'.
    Sean, is your alter ego aware of his silhouette..))

  6. Ardent,
    so it is.
    An elderly lady (83) recently said that in her youth the old folks used to say: 'The troughs remain always the same; only the pigs change.'

    thanks, the more as I do feel honoured being named in one breath with Lord Somber, whose work is de facto :) much more obscure than mine.
    As for the Turkish coffee: Actually, I do prefer my coffee filtred.

    as for Mr. Akyol's big car: It would be a shame didn't Fethullah Gülen pay his best mouthpiece well, would you agree? :)
    Still, I shall be reading his article.